Tuesday, September 27, 2011

My Mom's Demise

Mother is a short word but has a big meaning. She is the one who helps when we are not well or feeling down. Whenever we are in trouble, the first person who comes in our mind will be our mom. I lost my mom a month back. Still the feeling lingers and the loss is irreplaceable. In the broader sense she is no more and we can’t change the fate.

When I was a year old, I had an accident. Hot water poured all over my body. Skin from the front side of the body came off and she was the one who ran taking me to the hospital. She used to apply ointment and give tablets to me. I didn’t remember but can assume the care she had for me. She won’t even eat and will be praying to god for my goodness. The way mother cares is special and none can give it back.

Whenever i get hurt or not feeling she is the one who will come first to help. I will not go to hospital without her. At the age of 25 too she will be accompanying me. All people are children to their mom even if they are grownup.

Confidence

Basically I am from the Lower middle class family. My Mom was born and brought in North India. She didn’t know Tamil clearly when she came after marriage. But she has the maximum number of friends in my locality now. Everyone were praising about her helping tendency. She had the confidence to move well with all and to be precise she is very friendly. Helping others will be her motto. The way she handles the bank details astonishes many. She ran the family with 600 rupees in the start.

When I joined 11th, we had a money crunch in our family. We got about 5000 from my dad’s uncle. My mom said she will pay 500 per month and finish off the debt. She was very confident and she did what she promised. Till now my dad’s uncle will praise her for it. My dad’s salary was less than 5k at that time.

As a student I learnt the situation of my family and one thing which she had in my mind is not to ask someone’s help for my job. She wanted me to perform well in my studies and I too got placed in campus. Her brother’s will put money in her bank account but she had never taken a single penny even at the time of problem.

I am very happy that I fulfilled her wish of getting placed in a good concern without any recommendation. Now I am feeling proud that I made her soul happy and will continue to do so in the future even if she is no more. She made me confident and I owe her a lot for that.

Love and Affection

The love and affection she has in all is not tangible. She is the youngest of the lot in her family. She will be loved by all and she reciprocates doubly. I learnt from her the love and affection is not a reciprocating one but it should come from heart. It should not expect anything. The quality she had made her friendly to all. All relatives are very close to my mom because she is not a person who expects anything back. She won’t miss any functions and this quality will be not for all. From now on, many of my relatives and definitely us will miss her smile and helping tendency :(

She will have all the problems in mind and won’t reveal to us. She had some complications in her body but she will work as if nothing is there. Till 2 months back we were unaware of her condition. We admitted her in AG hospital in Tambaram on June 13th and she was discharged on June 18th. The complication further enhanced after that. Her face got bulged and whatever she ate was vomited. She lost about 15 kgs in 2 months. My Dad got retired on July 20th and we admitted her Sundaram Medical Foundation hospital on August 1st. For the first 8 days she was good and talking to all. We expected her to be discharged in another 2 days after the tests are over.

Shock strikes

After a week or so she was diagnosed with TB in her Liver. So Medication was started for it. Suddenly she was unable to breathe well and was put under oxygen mask for 2 days. She had some severe pain in wearing it but on insistence of me she wore it. I was beside her from that day and my dad was there from day 1. On August 13th her condition became very unstable. She wasn’t able to breathe well and changed to ICU. There also condition didn’t improved and so they said they need to put her in ventilator. She resisted by saying she doesn’t need ventilator. This was the last impressions she gave. After that her condition worsened and doctors also said they can’t do much. The fate was clear and my mom was waging a losing battle.

On August 14th 7.20 AM my mom passed away, Leaving her sons and beloved hubby. She would have not thought to go and definitely not to leave us. But the fate had other ideas and she is no more. She was youngest of lot in her family and the way my uncles and aunts cried moved me on. But as my mom tells be composed in whatever we do, I remained calm. I don’t know how I was composed but for the good I was composed to make all the rituals.

My Mom demise is the biggest shock of my life. She was my teacher and lead in all things I do. After I joined CTS I used to get my mom sari on her birthday without her knowledge. Now I can’t do that. I didn’t expect to end so abruptly. But life has to go on. This is in my mind right now. I need to take care of my dad and younger brother. That is my first priority now. I need to do what my mom wanted to do for my family.

Thanks mom!!! For giving the good things and the way you brought me up. The love and affection you showered on me.. The confidence you instilled on me…. Miss you mom :( :( :( Be with me in my life and guide me all the way through!!!!!!

God please give me the strength to lead my life without my mom. I know she will be with me mentally.Please help me whenever i miss her personally :) :) Mom is God and Vice versa!!!!!


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